The Glass House

I watch "The Glass House" from time to time and generally enjoy it - there are always laughs to be had. Tonight one comment really got my back up, so I submitted the following entry in the guest book. I wonder whether they’ll “print” it!

Breasts and Janette Howard

During the show tonight the panel questioned (to put it politely) why Janette Howard doesn't tend to dress to show cleavage.

I am only surmising, but one reason may be that she is a breast cancer survivor and like all breast cancer survivors, me included, has undergone surgery to remove, at the very least, her tumour/s and at the most removal of the whole breast along with lymph nodes. Many then go through chemotherapy, radiotherapy and years of drugs to increase their chances of survival. Reconstruction can be major surgery if you decide to go down that path.

I don't know what course of treatment Janette underwent. All treatments, like all breast cancers, are different.

Breast cancer survivors do have a great sense of humour, it's one of the things that gets us through diagnosis, treatment and the very real life-long niggling thoughts of this disease coming back or spreading to another part of the body, at sometime in the future.

Breast cancer does not discriminate. One in 11 women will be diagnosed at sometime in their lives - men are not immune either. Anyone can get it, young or old, male or female, rich or poor.

Yes I am passionate about the subject, but please take some time to think about it.

Sunday 30 May 2004

AC2 – Day 5

I’m still feeling very tired and seedy, like I have a giant hangover. I can’t get rid of the taste in my mouth and nothing tastes nice to eat or drink, all YUCK! I’ve tried chips, twisties, banana, choc, choc quik, cherry ripe. I think my tastebuds have “gone to God”.

I think the battery for our door bell has joined them!


Monday 31 May 2004

AC2 – Day 6

Still feeling hung over and tired. Nothing tastes nice.

I had a total meltdown in the supermarket today, shaking, crying, ranting, you name it – not a pretty sight. The straw that broke the camel’s back was a guy who wanted to go before me as he had only 1 item – I only had a few and had been waiting for ages so I said no. Why the hell should I have to wait longer for some old fuddy duddy in a gopher. I don’t think I’m coping very well at the moment.

Lucky

We were all fogged in this morning, quite an eerie sight. It’s reasonably rare here, especially in the metro area, but I love it all the same. Those trying to travel by air might have had a differing opinion though.

It’s hard to believe that winter officially starts in a couple of days. May has just flown by. At the end of this week, school will be half way through Term 2.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~
I managed to catch “Enough Rope” tonight. One of Andrew Denton’s guests was Tony Purkiss, a man who has “cheated” death 4 times, so far.

His first serious brush was during that infamous 1998 Sydney to Hobart yacht race in which several boats were damaged or destroys and lives lost, other injured (including him), due to a savage weather system.

His second was, as he likes to put it, a “forced landing” in a light aircraft (paddocks, fences, ditches, you get the idea).

His third was at the end of another Sydney Hobart when he had a heart attack brought on by a virus. Luckily there was a doctor on board and he was able to revive Tony.

His fourth was Bali last year. He and his wife were sitting 4 feet away from where a suicide bomber blew himself up. Their friends sitting at the same table were killed. Luckily their children were not with them that night, but off somewhere else. They both suffered burns, broken bones, perforated eardrums, serious eye damage and shrapnel wounds. Both will continue to receive treatment for some time to come.

All this, and his mates call him “Lucky”.

He has kept a keen sense of humour throughout and is an absolutely wonderful inspiration.

Tony, I wish you, your wife and your family a long, happy and especially safe future.


Saturday 29 May 2004

AC2 – Day 4

Took a Losec tab this morning – not sure whether it’s done any good though. Still feeling washed out and very tired. Dropped DH down at the caryard to pick up the new car and went off to the shops to buy some bread rolls for lunch.

Had a “sleep” in the afternoon. Took the car for a little drive later afternoon and bought pizza for dinner.

I still feel rather seedy and can’t get rid of the “taste” in my mouth. I can only hope I feel a bit more presentable in the morning. I think an early night is in order – hope it works, just have to wait for the bread to finish.

Sunday, funday

Our local city council has provided residents with a business/services directory - a great idea to let us know what’s available in our area.

Being the community minded person that I sometimes am, I had a quick look through it. After I realised I hadn’t totally lost my mind (now that’s a discovery and a half, let’s celebrate!) I discovered that pages 97 to 128 were missing, but the publishers had managed to compensate us with 2 sets of pages 129-160. Useful indeed!

Methinks those business that were to appear on the “missing” pages would be mightily unimpressed to find they’ve gone AWOL, especially if they’ve paid for the privilege of being part of the publication.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~
We spent a lovely, relatively lazy afternoon bowling with friends, then having a quiet coffee while the kids headed off to the playground. It was nice to just sit down, relax and chat. We really should do it more often.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~
I gave our long suffering lawn a feed tonight and reinstated the watering system. It’s been so dry and cold here of late, the lawn has taken the brunt of it. I’m sure it would benefit from de-thatching and coring - we may have to get an expert in to look at it.


Friday 28 May 2004

AC2 – Day 3

We worked on cleaning the inside and outside of the car this afternoon. DH washed and waxed, I washed the inside (doors, windows, dash, etc), It all seemed to take for ever, but it looked really good when we’d finished it.

DH went and looked at and test drove the 2 white 2002 Taragos they had just gotten in at the caryard. They are both ex-rentals, one from Adelaide, the other from somewhere interstate. He worked on a deal – boy was it hard. We eneded up going for the one with 67k on the clock as it was around $2k cheaper than the 40k one. They thought our car had been very sell looked after. The Tarago wasn’t registered and they can’t do it until Monday – they didn’t have any Trader plates available either so we had to leave the car there – grrrrrr – and pick it up tomorrow. There is also only 1 key so that has to be rectified too. Hopefully all will be sorted out sometime on Monday.

I filled the prescription for Losec tablets today – they should stop the grinding feeling in my stomach. I take one, once a day – will see how things go.

Still feeling tired and crabby.

Garden beds

I thought I was doing myself a favour last night by going to bed early, well 3 or more hours earlier than I have done in a very long time. I climbed into bed just before 10.15pm. Wouldn’t you know it, I woke at 2.20am and that was the end of my restful night. I did get more sleep, but it was punctuated by aches and pains and hot flushes. I still feel like crap. Ah well.

We spent a bit of time in the garden this morning, DH and the boys shifting wood and me planting replacements for my camellia and pittosporum that we lost last summer - I didn’t feel so bad about losing plants when one of the top nurseries here suffered many losses due to the sweltering heat we experienced. I also pruned back a lavender bush, the flower stalks from the lambs ears and part of a neighbour’s shrub that’s hanging over and into one of our shrubs. The poor green bin is full once again.

It’s a good feeling when you can see where you’ve been. The daffs and iris I planted in post last year are starting to sprout, so I’ve moved them to where we can enjoy them. Our mandarin tree is not doing very well so will have to be moved to a sunnier spot. At the moment, it’s too shaded by the huge ficus next door and our macadamia.

There is a large deciduous tree that overhangs our fence from a neighbour. Unfortunately, over the years, it’s become chronically infected with a mistletoe – it’s a complete mess. While I was out in the garden the neighbour mentioned that he was getting someone in to look at is and remove at least one large branch that overhangs as he’s concerned that it might fall. Most of the tree hangs over our side of the fence these days as he’s pruned his side back quite heavily, so it’s a valid reason. It does provide some lovely shade in summer, but because of the infestation, I wouldn’t be that sad to see the whole thing go. It will make constructing the kids’ cubby house easier (if they get one) and also give us the opportunity to plant something we like in the corner that wouldn’t have to compete with heavy shade. I’d better get my thinking cap on methinks!


Thursday 27 May 2004

AC2 – Day 2

Went to Australia’s Biggest Morning Tea function (to raise money for cancer research) at H’s school – drank cup of tea and 3 glasses of water. Took stemetil at around 10.40am.

I vacuumed out our car – floors seats, boot, etc – took me 1-1.5 hours ugh – it wore me out!

Feeling tired.

Menopause

Like becoming a parent for the first time, nobody tells you the whole truth about menopause either. Why do women conspire, to not necessarily hide, but neglect to tell you what it may be like in a practical sense? They are doing their own a mighty disservice.

Some women will breeze through it with little or none of the dreaded side effects of losing your hormones. Others will battle on with it for years, some may be able to take HRT or other “natural” medications, and power to those who can, just beware of the increased risk of breast cancer from long term usage. Some of us can’t and get the most out of our daily lives, within the limitations our bodies place on us.

I’m no scare-monger, I just want to be told the truth, all of it.

So here’s my take on “instant” menopause.

Signs of menopause

You swap your monthly sanitary protection for daily incontinence products.

You hear the call of nature, but can’t answer it in time.

You fear coughing, sneezing and laughing.

In the supermarket queue, you want to beat a complete stranger into a pulp because they dared to ask if they could go in front of you, after all, they have only 2 items!

You forget what you’re talking about mid-sentence.

You can’t think of particular words and have trouble describing the word you’re looking for.

You continually put things in a “safe place” then can’t remember where any of your safe places are.

You wonder why the toilet paper won’t fit in the fridge.

You wonder why your pre-wash spray won’t kill flies.

You can’t remember anybody’s name (including your family), even though you’ve known them for years, or you’ve just been introduced.

You write multiple lists for everything.

You always manage to leave your lists home that you should have taken with you.

You forget appointments, even when they are clearly written in your diary and on the calendar.

You do the “hokey pokey” all night with your bedding.

A sheet is too much bedding.

You suffer insomnia and then don’t get more than 1 hours sleep at a time.

You wonder why everyone around you is so damned incompetent.

You wonder how drivers got or keep their licences.

You can’t do more than simple jobs in the garden or else your head will explode.

Your scalp oozes perspiration that runs down you back and drops off the end of your nose.

You sweat around the eyes.

People worry when after the simplest tasks your face turns beetroot.

Mowing the lawn is a major achievement, after which you need a shower and complete change of clothes.

You can’t enjoy a hot drink, a glass of wine, hot soup of a curry because you’re frightened your head will explode.

Your joints ache.

You take evening primrose oil in an effort to relieve hot flushes, only to get diarrhea, and you still have hot flushes.
You realise that PMS and placenta brain have nothing on menopause.


Wednesday 26 May 2004

AC2 – Day 1

Took J to Kindergym.

I’m supposed to test drive a van this morning. H still thinks we should get a blue car as it’s cool.

12 noon – onc for second chemo treatment.

Kindergym ran over time so I didn’t leave until 10.22am. had to race home, drop J off and go test drive the Tarago. It is very nice to drive, you sit up high, but don’t feel like you’re climbing into it. It runs very quietly too.

Then had to race home gather up J and DH and head off to our friends. J settled in quickly, especially when there was a cat to “chase”.

Got the clinic with 5 mins to spare.

My bloods were OK from mid cycle, although the white count was down a little more than normal. I mentioned about all the dryness of skin etc, but there’s not much than can be done – I can’t drink much more than I am – well over the 2 litres a day. He wasn’t concerned about the puffiness in my left forearm.

Went into clinic, and it was almost a full house (ended up being that way) and had blood drawn. Ate a sandwich and had a choc milk. Was given the anti-emetics, then Adriamycin, then cyclophosphamide – it took about 2.15 to 2.30. Found that the tube was a bit bent in my arm. Left at about 2.35-2.40pm and we drove back to our friends. J had been very good and played well. He was a bit tired though and ended up sleeping in the car for about 30 mins.

I had soup for tea.

Took stemetil before bed.

Next treatment is 11am 16 June 2004.

How we feel

I think this summarises what may of those with cancer think and feel, thanks frobbi.

The Survivor Movie


Tuesday 25 May 2004

AC1 – Day 21

I really look moth-eaten today, my poor head! More hair again today than yesterday in the shower drain. At this rate, it’ll all be gone in a couple of days. There certainly is not much left now.

More Medicare cheques arrived today and a bill from the surgeon. I have to go to my private health insurance provider to claim some of the pathology bill as it was in hospital, then pay the balance to the path people. I also have a cheque for the surgeon which I’ll drop in.

I paid the last of the surgeon’s bills (Medicare cheque and gap) and finalised the path bill. Just the Hospital Pharmacy bill to go before 31 May, at this stage.

Now that’s the way to go!

A girlfriend and I went to see "The Da Vinci Code" today. We chose to go “Gold Class” – ooooooo, nice indeedy!

For anyone that’s not familiar with GC, it’s located in a sealed off section, you’re greeted at the door, asked to take a seat in the lounge area, check over the menu, have a drink if you like, then you order your food and drinks, nominating a time for service. An usher then takes you to your Moran recliner in the cinema, you bring up the footrest, lay back and enjoy the movie, and your order is served at the appropriate time.

It is all very civilised and well worth the extra $3 (food and drink is extra of course) it would cost to see a movie in one of the regular cinemas. It was very much like being at home, but with a bigger screen.

This is definitely the way to go for a movie night out.

Oh and for the record, I enjoyed the movie. Now to read the book!


Monday 24 May 2004

AC1 – Day 20

More hair than yesterday in the shower drain. My part is now a valley, there are larger bald patches and my hair is looking very thin. My scalp has been aching as my hair hates being held the wrong way then pushed back the right way. It’s almost like it’s being wriggled like a loose tooth, just waiting to come out.

I posted the Medicare info back today (safety net stuff). Here’s hoping that we can get 100% of scheduled fee instead of 85%, very soon.

I felt tired today and rested a reasonable amount in the morning and early afternoon.

We’ve been looking at getting another vehicle, specifically a Toyota Tarago 8 seater van. Our main reason is leg room, both front and rear.

DH went to look at a couple more car yards after I got home from picking up H. H asked where he was going and he said to buy a car. Henry’s reply was, “buy the blue one, it’s cool”.

Mum phoned to let me know about Jane and Glenn McGrath appearing on Andrew Denton’s “Enough Rope” tonight, talking about her cancer.

It was very interesting and I felt I related very well to what she said and I laughed along with her on some points.

Mercury falling

Winter is almost at our door, not the damp, but the cold (at least for us). After huddling, wrapped in blankets the last few evenings in a vain attempt to keep warm, we bit the bullet and lit our first fire of the year last night. And oh, it was lovely!

Although we have ducted reverse cycle, DH still prefers our wood heater, and I tend to agree with him, there’s nothing quite like a genuine wood fuelled flame.

I grew up with an open wood fire in our lounge room and a wood fired stove in the kitchen, which doubled as our water heater. Fallen tress and branches were gathered from out in the paddocks and brought to the wood heap. No self respecting farm didn’t have a sizeable wood heap! It was then sawn into usable (usually) lengths using a piece of machinery built by my grandfather (I think) which was powered by a belt attached to the flywheel on the Lanz tractor. Then the fun began with the axe. I got to be a dab hand at splitting all but the most knotted and stubborn logs. If we wanted to have hot water and cook, we had to chop wood and get a fire going every day, winter and summer.

There was an art to setting a fire on the brick hearth in the lounge room. Tightly crunched up newspaper in the middle, small sticks then “tented” up around it, and a few medium sized “logs” added. We had a wooden framed screen that covered the entire fireplace and prevented sparks from flying out when the wood, especially pine, had a spitting fit. The screen was also great for placing a sheet of newspaper on to help the fire draw and boy, would it roar! On the odd occasion it needed a little helping hand, thank goodness for kerosene. Once the fire was established, the screen could be removed and we could enjoy the warmth, the dancing flames or stick the toasting fork in for an evening snack.

I fondly remember the nights we’d roll the lounge around to face the fire and all cram on to it. We’d talk, play scrabble, cards, or later, watch a little TV. So the “romance” of a genuine wood fuelled fire lives on.


Sunday 23 May 2004

AC1 – Day 19

My hair started falling out in larger amounts today in the shower – yuck! You shampoo and “wipe” your head under the shower and it comes out in handfuls. It sticks to your body and takes forever to wash off. It clogs the drain. You get out of the shower and towel dry your hair and more comes out, and more sticks to your body. Then you use a hairdryer and more sticks to your body so you use the dryer in an attempt blow it off – ugh!

The bald patches are starting.

How time and progress completely changes a face

The SA Institute of Technology (SAIT) at The Levels was built on a large parcel of land between the abattoir sheep paddocks that were low lying and had much standing water in them each winter, and the Parafield airport. The institution stuck out like a saw thumb.

In 1978, even the buses only called in there early morning and late afternoon, at other times you had to walk across the seemingly huge sporting fields to the main road, or trudge about a mile across the pathless cow paddocks to catch a train. Car parking was almost at a premium and half of it was dirt.

In those early days, it was very much a male dominated seat of learning, with degree courses in civil, mechanical and electronic engineering, chemical technology, medical technology, metallurgy and geology being offered.

The Union Building was at the centre of campus life, the infamous “Caf”. The staff always seemed so darned serious and sour. It was the place to be fed such unforgettable foods like “caf chips” and if you were one of the quite rare female species, you were the centre of attention, whether you wanted it or not. It was also the place where I met my future husband.

Once the abattoir was “moved” outside the metro area, a huge area of land, including vast sheep paddocks, was left totally vacant and the State Government had to make decisions as to it’s use.

With the demise of the Multi Function Polis (MFP) on industrial land at Gillman, boy how I’ve always hated that name, the Government had the perfect opportunity to transfer their ideas to the new site.

In 1982 Australia’s first “technology park” was created. It was then deemed necessary to create housing for those who worked there, so Mawson Lakes (named after Antarctic explorer Sir Douglas Mawson) was born. Artificial lakes and waterways were created to deal with the almost swamp-like conditions that occurred every winter. Even the cow paddocks are in the process of being replaced by roads, houses and waterways as the tentacles feel their way around that side. A new train and bus interchange has been built where the little, dreary old railway station used to stand and they’ve tissied up the name from Greenfields to reflect the name of the new suburb.

The master plan calls for “approximately 11,000 residents in 4,300 homes by 2010, plus 6,000 students and an estimated business community of 8,000”. There are now all levels of education encompassed in the development.

In 1992 SAIT amalgamated with the SA Colleges of Advanced Education and became the University of SA.

All homes were built pre-wired for technology, and a huge water recycling project was undertaken – this water is piped in from a treatment works 8km away. Each home has 2 sources of water, fresh for drinking, bathing, washing, etc, and recycled for garden and toilet use.

The suburb has an “exclusive” feel about it, something for which the developers have a reputation. Around 30% of the area has been devoted to waterways and green space, and public works of art abound. However, the housing blocks are small, most homes are double storey and have little or no yards – sadly, much the same as most modern housing I suppose.

We don’t get to that side of the city very often these days, and if we do, it’s only because we’re on our way to destinations much further a field. It felt strange driving through the area today, we were, to say the least, quite surprised at the changes over the last 28 years, but I’m pleased we decided to get off the main road and have a quiet little drive around. There was still enough of the old SAIT to evoke memories of simpler, more carefree times.

Green Fingers = Blisters

Although we’ve been thinking about it off and on for quite some time, well, a couple of years if the truth be known, today we started on our front yard, although only in a small way.

One of the first tasks is to decide what’s staying and what’s going. Then comes the fun of removing the “unwanted” flora. So today, with secateurs, pruning shears and grubber in hand, it was time to say goodbye to the huge yellow daisy bush, a native melaluca, 2 juniper type bushes, some scrappy butterfly bushes and some of the “evil” ivy that has invaded our yard from next door. Clearing the yard will take a while as we’re restricted (by bin size) as to how much we can dispose of every fortnight.

We put the daisy bush through the shredder/mulcher and it was reduced to a small pile of mulch in no time. I’d forgotten how darned noisy that thing is. Our poor green waste bin was filled with quite a bit of dead wood and prickly stuff – bring on Monday when it’s collected and we can refill it!

The boys did a wonderful job helping. H pulled up quite a chunk of paving. I’m so proud of his efforts and sticking to the task at hand.

We cleared enough greenery to enable measurements to be taken so I can draw up a plan. There’s a strip roughly 15m long by 3.7 wide down the side, and 20m wide (minus driveway and path) by 4m deep across the front. The areas are not that deep so will require some careful planning. I have a partial design in my head and a narrow garden plan in a book which I could adapt, so that should make it a little easier.

The remainder of the winding path will have to come up and will be replaced by steppers, in some form. They will probably follow a similar line. Eons ago we bought a water feature in the guise of a statue, so she will have to find a home within the grand plan too.

The fun will be on in earnest when it comes to deciding what to plant!

In the meantime, I wait form my oozing blister to heal.


Thursday 20 May 2004

AC1 – Day 16

My period started today and I have another cold starting up, although the last one technically never went.

Aunty M dropped around this morning with a Shepherd’s Pie for us. We had a bit of a chat about me, her and life in general.

Saw my GP, had a bit of a chat about how things are going and got a referral for my onc.

Medicare have informed me that we are closing in on the safety net amount for out of hospital expenses, ie dr visits, scans, etc. Once the safety net has been reached, they will pay 100% of the scheduled fee until the end of the year (31 Dec 04), which will be nice.

Technically this should go under 21 May as it’s after midnight, but I had to put this down. My hair is starting to fall out! It’s from the right side top of my head.

Hello, Goodbye!

Yes call centres, those places one loves to hate and currently the bane of my existence – I do have a dull little life it seems.

Their computers are set up to dial a whole host of numbers at once, they pick on the first poor person to answer and leave the rest on hold on a dead line or with Muzac (blerk) playing. Sometimes there’s a computer generated voice asking you to hold – the audacity of it all!

They hide their numbers so you don’t know who’s calling and to prevent you from phoning them or registering complaints to the company ultimately responsible.

Why do they program their computers to keep dialing the same number, time after time, day after day when they continually get the pickup and immediate hang up treatment, or the answering machine, non stop?

The companies that set up these networks must have at least a modicum of intelligence (or is that too much like wishful thinking?) or else they wouldn’t be in business. How much programming skill would it take to filter out those numbers that continually hang up? All they do at the moment is infuriate the general public and make sure that the services they are spruiking and the companies they represent, will go to the bottom of my list (If they appear at all), should I ever have a need for the type of service they are “offering”, if you can ever find out who is calling in the first place – not a good advertising strategy at all, I would suggest!

This brings me to the “no call” register. When will this be available here? I know they want to do it right and all that, but keeping us in the dark as to what’s happening, is not the best option. Will those in authority and the legislators get off their collective bottoms and get something set up, or at least keep the public up to date on its progress!

Having my privacy invaded by hawkers and collectors at the door is one thing, but I utterly detest being “assaulted” by someone trying to sell me something that I don’t want and never asked for, let alone someone who claims to be calling from locally, when you know they’re sitting thousands of kilometres away in a foreign land. That’s outright lying and I won’t abide it!

A friend received a call centre call, which, judging by the accent, originated overseas. The conversation went something like this:

Friend: Where are you calling from?
CC: Australia
Friend: Where abouts in Australia?
CC: Sydney
Friend: What’s the weather like in Sydney today?
CC: errrrrr………

Another incident saw the caller inform us that we “HAD” to listen to what he had to say – I don’t think so!

I utterly abhor junk mail on the phone. Anyone who’s familiar with Kevin “Bloody” Wilson’s song “Dictaphone” would “catch my drift”.


Tuesday 18 May 2004

AC1 – Day 14

Hair "down there" decided to start vacating my body yesterday.

I collected my new glasses today.

Had an appointment for a blood test at 3.45pm with my onc.

I told him that things were going quite well, better than I had expected and he said that this first cycle would be fairly indicative of the rest of my treatment, which is a relief.

He wondered why I was wearing a wig already as hair normally starts to fall out the day after patients see him for their blood test. I told him about my little party and he thought that was a good idea.

As far as the blood test is concerned, no news is good news.

Mothers’ Day

The annual Mothers’ Day Classic was held today. It’s a 4 or 8km walk or run to raise funds for breast cancer research. The event is now run in most capital cities. I think it’s the second year it’s been held here.

In taking part I was one of around 30,000 participants nationwide (and 1,700 here in Adelaide), in the knowledge that the amount raised since the inception of the event would go past $2 million today. We have to remember that Adelaide has a population of around 1 million, and Australia 20 million.

The Adelaide course was a loop, set around the city part of the Torrens Linear Park – quite picturesque.

Since my level of fitness is total crap and I haven’t walked more than a couple of kilometres straight in the last 2 and a bit years, I chose to do the 4km walk. I really wanted to do this walk for me, to prove that I could do it. I also wanted to dedicate it to some other women who have been diagnosed with breast cancer. Many participants dedicated their efforts to loved ones.

We woke to a cloudy day of around 13C. By 9.30am (walk start time), it had warmed to a cosy 14C!

Bottled water was supplied, as was fresh fruit and a “goody bag” (including a participation medallion) at the end of the event. Purple sponsor’s balloons were bobbing around everywhere, tied to walkers’ hair, backpacks, strollers, wrists.

The 4km runners went first, followed by the 8km runners. The walkers then had an aerobic warm up session – I was afraid if I did the warm up, I wouldn’t make the distance! One minutes silence was observed to remember those with breast cancer and those who are no longer with us.

It was then time to get under way. Trying to negotiate the start gate was a task in itself. It took a few minutes for everyone to squeeze through. After a couple more bottlenecks in the early stages, one going under a bridge, the other traversing the weir at the end of Torrens Lake, the field had a chance to spread out a bit. I suppose I was about 1/4 to 1/3 of the way from the head of the walkers, which was quite good.

The route was mostly flat, with the occasional rise, enough to put a strain on poor old me. The biggest problem I had was with the camber of the track, it was giving my right knee a hurry up.

Although the boys were watching from near the start/finish gates, I didn’t see them as they waved to me across the water.

Towards the end, the hot flushes were cutting in and the balls of my feet were starting to scream at me.

The walkers were not timed, but I covered the 4km in around 40-45 minutes – I was pleased with the result.

There was an entertainer at the finish gate who thought he was a comedian. He got my back up by saying that the runners had finished and we were the stragglers/slackers, something along those lines that didn’t sound very nice to me (can’t remember exactly what he said), but I was not impressed so I let him know “I’ll give you a dose of chemo and see how you go!” I don’t think he was impressed either, but stiff!

I hadn’t realised how lopsided I am these days – damned prosthesis! *blush*

They had free entertainment – music, bouncy castle, stilt walkers, etc along with catering; a sausage sizzle, pancakes, coffee, etc. The big tiger bouncy castle was constantly in demand.

It was a good morning, and although we didn’t see sunshine, it was great weather for walking. A case of “hat hair” followed me around all day, but hey, I’m proud of my accomplishment. I hope to do it again next year. Whether I tackle the 4 or 8km will depend on how fit I manage to get by then.

YES, I DID IT!!!


Friday 14 May 2004

AC1 – Day 10

Day 10 of treatment

I feel lousy today, whether it’s because it’s day 10, or just that I’m too tired, I don’t know.

I feel that I’m not getting any emotional support from DH – I could use a few hugs and someone telling me that it’s all going to be OK. We hardly talk any more, he’s always got his nose in his computer, morning, noon and night, and meal times (the height of bad manners in my opinion). I suppose it’s his way of coping.

Everything seems incredibly dry, mouth, eyes, hands, etc, even though I’m keeping my fluid intake up.

After dropping H at school, I slept/rested most of the day on the sofa, and didn’t have much of an appetite.

I took a couple of paracetamol tablets later in the day as my head was giving me a hard time.

I haven’t been coping very well emotionally with all this and often almost cry myself to sleep at night.

Just call me Mrs Fixit

I’ve always had a loathing for cleaning dishes. I had a major coup when we had our kitchen done as part of our last round of extensions and renovations in 1994, and we purchased our electrically operated (as opposed to one that has 2 arms, 2 legs and only works sometimes) dishwasher.

For some reason, DH thought it would be a white elephant – and I thought he knew me better than that!

Over the years, I’ve been diligent in cleaning it and running cleaners through it, but alas, we’ve had to call for service twice due to the pressure switch failing. In truth, the reservoir connected to the electronics part of the pressure switch has become clogged with muck. This means that the water inflow does not cut off properly, and it doesn’t empty – yes huge puddles on the floor and we have a machine that won’t run a full cycle – yeah, useless as…

I suppose the last service call was around 2 years ago, after said dishwasher being inoperative for a couple of months.

All was going well until about a week ago when the telltale flooding of the floor recommenced.

This time I decided that with the symptoms presented, I should be able to do the repairs myself. I pulled the offending part out, and sure enough it was absolutely clogged with crap again. Once cleaned out and reinstalled, and replacing the hose to the pressure switch (using one replaced on a previous service call - sometimes pays to be hoarders) it worked like a charm – you little bewdy!

So once again, I’m a happy little vegemite, with a properly functioning dishwasher and I’ve kept that $200-250 in my pocket!

Farewell Auntie M

Today we celebrated the life of Auntie M, my dad’s sister. All her siblings and the cousins were there. It was good to see them, but sad due to the circumstances that brought us there. The last 3 times we’ve been together has been at funerals, firstly Uncle G in 1999, then Grandma in 2000 and now Auntie M.

There was a private cremation this morning, attended by Auntie M’s children, siblings and grandchildren. This afternoon they held a service of thanksgiving at the church she attended. The minister gave a lovely eulogy and my cousin J (Aunt’s youngest daughter) had some lovely words to say on behalf of all the family. She handled it wonderfully in what were very difficult circumstances. I spoke with her afterwards and she said that during the last couple of years when her mother was ill, she spent a lot of time with her and got to really know more than the mother side of her. Her mother treasured those times and J will carry those memories with her always.

Auntie M never let her illnesses tie her down. She lived to her limitations. There was even a trip to Darwin in July planned.

The order of service in included some poems, which I wish to share here:

A mothers love is something
That no one can explain.
It is made of deep devotion,
And of sacrifice and pain.
It is endless and unselfish, and
Enduring come what may,
For nothing can destroy it
Or take that love away.
- Unknown

Now we must walk the way ahead without her,
and take for company,
the echos of her voice,
the energy of her being,
the strength of her faith,
the security of her love
and live our lives well.
- Pauline Brooks

An urn of her ashes will be laid to rest with Uncle G. As she always held a spot in her heart for the farm where she was born and grew up (now owned by my brother), some of her ashes will be scattered there and a tree planted in her memory.

Afternoon tea was served in the church hall afterwards, where there was also a display of photos from Auntie M’s life. They brought back some memories and was a lovely touch.


Tuesday 11 May 2004

AC1 – Day 7

It’s 2 months since I went to the doctor for a pap smear and to have my lump checked, a lot has happened in that time!

I’m having my hair cut off at 1pm today at the local hairdresser. I’m having a little “wake” with SIL and friend R.

I wanted to beat the drugs to it!

J was a little upset at not having much sleep, but settled down OK.

I made up some canapés on mini toasts (ham, smoked salmon, metwurst, etc and garnishes), along with roasted capsicum dip and Andrew Garrett Sparkling Burgundy.

The hairdresser put my hair in 2 plaits and cut them off, I cried, it was hard to see all that hair go.

She then washed my hair and cut it short (scissors) – the longest is about 1.5cm, I think.

I put my wig on and realised it needed a little adjustment, so I went back to Bonnie Wigs to get it attended to. They cut a bit more off the fringe and we’ll see if it needs more adjusting when it settles more.

My head was getting incredibly itchy, I’m not sure whether it was the shampoo, the hair cut or getting used to the wig, but it’s “murder”. I picked up some DermaVeen (sp?) shampoo from National Pharmacies on the way home from picking H up.

I had positive comments about my new hair. H’s teacher saw me and thought it looked like me but wasn’t sure, so told H to stay with her until “Mum” arrived to collect him!

DH arrived home around 7pm from Sydney.

I have some red lumps coming up just under my hairline – perhaps from itching, perhaps not. I put some antiseptic cream on them.

Mum and Daughter Day

Today, Mum and I had a rare opportunity to spend time together. We went to the movies, had some lunch and did a spot of shopping (of the window variety as it turned out).

It was lovely to be able to do it. I can’t remember when we last did something like it. There are always too many things in the way; tyranny of distance, work, children…

I made a couple of cards for Mothers’ Day tonight; a “white” chrysanthemum on pink with a black mat.




Monday 10 May 2004

AC1 – Day 6

I think my dizziness had finally gone!

The ulcers didn’t eventuate, thank goodness.

Grandparents Day

The boys’ school held its annual Grandparents (and Special Friends) Day today, with some 430 expected to attend for preschool through to Year 2 children. The choir sang, there were classroom visits, then morning tea was served (I’m glad I wasn’t serving that many cups of tea and coffee – I helped set up earlier).

Mum and Dad were able to be here for the boys, which was great, and the boys were so excited about them being there.

Mum missed out on so much while I was at boarding school as she was working full time. She’s pleased to be able to do something with her grandchildren, although not as much as she’d like.


Sunday 9 May 2004

AC1 – Day 5

Mothers’ Day

H had made me a lovely card and some love hearts for the fridge at school. The boys gave me a “lovely” card – it was humourous, which is probably something that I needed.

We had an “early” lunch at Manto Café on The Parade, outside, it was lovely just sort of relaxing, as much as one can do with 2 young kids in tow. I ordered fried calamari, DH had a Caesar Salad and the boys, pizza and wedges.

DH went back to Sydney tonight and will be home Tuesday night.

Yesterday I found a couple of mouth ulcers possibly starting up, there were 2 white lumps in my mouth. I felt a little, not queasy, but just a little grinding in the stomach, so I have to eat lots of little things.

The joy of boys

I'm mostly very proud of the boys' good manners. However, last night, James proved he is his father's son.

During dinner, James let a huge botty burp (I have this “thing” about younger children using the word “fart”, so it’s not in the boys’ vocab – YET) go which rattled the chair, and he said nothing.

DH prompted him by asking, "What do you say?"

James replied, "OUCH!"

There wasn't a straight face in the room.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

During our recent holiday, DH bought a brass money bank to remind him of his day at Sovereign Hill, which currently resides on the table. Whenever he has some change, he “banks” it.

Tonight, while he was going through his banking ritual, H was heard to say;

“Daddy, you won’t have any cents!”

This was closely followed by, “Daddy you really do need some cents”.

Understandably, DH and I found ourselves agreeing with him!

Aren’t children perceptive?

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

So what do stupid devoted parents of obsessed Thunderbirds children do on a Saturday night at home?

Well apart from trying to hunt down sets on internet auction sites that end up going for outrageous prices, they set about making Thunderbird vehicles from Lego.

The aim was to make facsimiles (close or otherwise) of Thunderbirds 2 and 4, a workable pod for TB2 and The Mole. TB4 and The mole had to fit in the pod. I apologise for my crappy photos.





Here are the “genuine” models.






The look of absolute delight on the boys’ faces when they first laid eyes on my creations, told me all my efforts had just been repaid.

I became so carried away, I made another 2 pods and 4 more TB 4s today. There is no hope for me, of that I’m sure.



The “genuine” model


OK, so they’re not accurate masterpieces, but the kids spent hours playing with them today, and that’s the important thing. They may now also be amenable to creating a Lego “Tracy Island” – another challenge for Mum and a couple of trips to the Lego spare parts shop, methinks.

Photos of the “genuine” models by Robin & Pauline at Space City and displayed at: http://thunderbirds.sfdaydreams.com/toys/ktbirds.htm


Friday 7 May 2004

AC1 – Day 3

Took the last of the anti nausea tablets today and am still feeling OK.

Took J to playgroup and he had a good time.

DH arrived home from Sydney after the kids went to bed.

Auntie M

My Auntie M, my dad’s sister, passed away at 5am this morning. She was in her 72nd year. Her eldest daughter was at her bedside.

Auntie M had kidney and heart problems and had been ill for quite some time. She’d been doing home dialysis for a couple of years and was on the verge of having to get it done in hospital. She was due to have a second round of heart related surgery last Wednesday to do some corrections, but was sent home as she wasn’t well enough. She returned to the hospital on Friday as she was really unwell. Auntie had been revived during and after her previous surgery a little while back, after which she put a DNR order in place. Due to her not being in hospital for a full 24 hours, they want to do an autopsy.

Auntie M grew up on the same farm as me, trained as a school teacher, then married (just a handful of weeks after my parents) and moved to her husband’s farm in a different part of the State. They had three daughters and worked the farm until my uncle’s ill health saw them sell the property and move to Adelaide some 10-12 years ago.

They loved 4WDing, especially up in the northern parts of Australia in the winter, a haven for the “grey army”.

When we were kids, we went camping in various parts of the upper Flinders Ranges together – we had a great time.

Mum and Auntie M went on a 1 week cruise out of Brisbane a couple of years ago and had a ball. Her kidney problems virtually precluded her from any more holidays.

Auntie M was a lovely lady and very community minded.

She lost her husband to cancer nearly 7 years ago.

In recent years, there has been some family disharmony, resulting in a split from one of her daughters. I know this caused her great stress, something a person with cardiac problems doesn’t need. I can only hope that rift may have had a chance to cool.

Auntie M is survived by her 3 daughters and 6 grandchildren and has been reunited with Uncle G. She will be farewelled by family and friends on Thursday.

Rest In Peace, Auntie M.


Thursday 6 May 2004

AC1 – Day 2

DH left for Sydney this morning and will be home tomorrow night. I feel well, which is a pleasant surprise. I do feel dry though.

Took 2 stemetil before bedtime.

Bowlin’ bowlin’ bowlin’

Keep those pins aflyin’
With the bumpers guiding
Steee..rrike!

OK, so I’m no songwriter, but just humour me a little.

H has been invited to take part in the Junior State Championships in a couple of weeks time. He’ll be competing in the under 8 bumper bowling competition.

He has jumped at the chance, mainly because it’s 2 more games, not that it’s a competition.

So it looks like we’ll be packing the proverbial water bag, setting the alarm and heading off early on a Sunday morning.

I just hope he can keep those tantrum demons at bay…

Chasing Tracy

The boys’ obsession strong interest in the Thunderbirds has been ongoing since the Christmas holidays when DH introduced them to our complete series of dvds, and the movie, “Thunderbirds Are Go”.

After the fiasco that was H’s birthday present, a multi-game table, including soccer (it was broken, had to be returned and we’ve not been able to replace it), we’ve been looking at other replacement options. While out shopping, we found Thunderbirds Soundtech Tracy Island at quite a reduced price. We were almost ready to buy it until we realized that it didn’t come with any vehicles – they are sold separately. Be buggered if we were going to pay $200 for the island, plus all the vehicles!

So we’ve been scouring the net looking at options and found that the range of “stuff” available is, well not like a tiny speck of a Tracy Island in the vast Pacific! After much searching, H had decided he’d prefer “Thunderbirds Powertech Tracy Island’, a smaller unit which opens up to show workable launch bays and includes 4-5 of the vehicles – hey, my brain can’t recall how many there are in the set.

Now it’s time to track down a reasonably priced.

H in particular is very excited at the prospect. The only down side is that we’ll have to keep J’s wrecking mitts off it! The boys have pocket money they can put towards bits and pieces. I guess we’ll have to help J out with some TB gear of his own.

J has homed in on one particular part of the episode “The Imposters”, where a really cool dude is sitting right back, driving his red convertible. In unison, the boys and cool dude say:

“At last, a stretch of clear road, no crazy road hogs getting in the way of my beeeutifil wagon.
Alright baby, here we go.
That’s my baby, that’s my babyyy!!!”

J mimics it really well and it makes me laugh every time.


Wednesday 5 May 2004

AC1 – Day 1

Took J to Kindergym and the play cafe as usual this morning.

Today marked the start of my chemotherapy. I’ve been very nervous and apprehensive about this.

My appointment with my oncologist was set down for 2pm.

K across the road offered to mind J for us, which was a huge help. H would be going to after school care as my appointment was likely to be 2 hours plus.

I filled in the necessary paperwork at the front desk which states that I’m having treatment as a day patient, so it is covered by my insurance.

We then waited for the appointment, filled out more paperwork and sorted out the blood test and next treatment appointments.

My onc went through what was involved with my treatment. I would be having 4 by 3 week cycles of AC (Adriamicin and Cyclophosphamide) to start with. He went through the side effects and when they were likely to “strike” if at all. Prescriptions for anti nausea tablets were written out and instructions given – they were only to be taken for 2 days, some morning only before eating, others morning and night after eating, and Stemetil as needed. My heart scan had come back within the normal range of 50-80 and although it was 53, it was not that much different from 79. He listened to my heart and checked my wound site.

I needed to organise a referral from my GP.

We then went into the clinic where I had a gelco put in, blood was drawn for testing and saline drip started. We waited for the blood results to come back (which took some time) before starting treatment. Anti nausea drugs were given first (IV), then the red Adriamicin, a large horse needle syringe which was manually given through the drip over time, then the Cyclophosphamide was hooked in from a separate drip bag.

I could taste these drugs as they were administered and had some ice and crackers.

The set up was quite nice, they have recliner chairs and heating pads to put your arm on. They have a large fish tank with several types of tropical fish.

We finished treatment at around 4.25pm. I went to the toilet before I left and my pee was already reddish, which surprised me a little as I didn’t think it would happen so quickly.

We picked H up from after school care at 4.35pm, although he didn’t want to leave as he was cutting pigs out of green playdough and having too good a time.

Surprisingly, I felt quite OK.

Took 2 stemetil before bedtime, just in case.

I put my fluoride trays for the first time tonight.

Assessment day

J had his speech and language assessment today, well most of it was done. He did very well and we were quite relieved that there are no major problems. J has been getting quite frustrated and flustered when asked questions – this has been getting more pronounced over the last few weeks. If he initiates the conversation, he can talk the leg of a chair!

The assessment so far has shown he does have a little language delay and could benefit from help with his expression too. It will be finished off in a couple of weeks and we will then get a report. J will be having fortnightly sessions, which can be done while he’s at school.


Tuesday 4 May 2004

Picked up the dental trays and fluoride gel. I don’t know how I’ll go wearing them each night.

Incoming mail

The cap I ordered is here too! I guess I’ll just have to take part in the MDC now. At least I have something to keep my head “dry” should it rain.

Better Homes and Gardens decided to send me an “offer of subscription renewal”. Why the heck didn’t they send it in December when I received my last issue? Mum had previous given me a 2 year subscription for Christmas. I think I’d only purchased 1 issue since then, well up until this morning when I bought the latest edition - strange that it should arrive today – more spooks at work!


Monday 3 May 2004

I had my heart scan today. One of the chemo drugs they’re planning to give me can cause damage to the heart, so my "pump" had to be checked out to see if it will be able to handle the Adriamicin (Doxorubicin). The test involved being injected with radioactive isotope, then being scanned. I ended up with a lovely coloured film this time.

Term 2 begins

An uneventful day.

The boys enjoyed being back at school, even if I had to virtually drag them out of bed this morning. It usually takes a couple of days to get back into the swing of things. J is quite the independent chap, unpacking his bag, choosing a new reader, getting everything ready for the day. These days I drop H in his classroom, then he’s ready to say “bye bye” – he’s growing up!

I had a very droll time shopping to restock the fridge and pantry.

Oh, I almost forgot, my number and tribute tag for the Mothers Day Classic arrived in the mail today.


Sunday 2 May 2004

It's 1 month since the second surgery. Anniversaries already!

4 year olds don’t really appreciate fine art

It was the last day of the school holidays today, so time for one last hurrah before settling back into the school routine for another 10 weeks.

A girlfriend and her 2 daughters joined the boys and I for few hours of sport, dining and fine art. Perhaps I over exaggerate just a wee bit?

Our sport entailed targeting 10 white bottle-like objects with a spherical weight, otherwise known as 10 pin bowling. The 4 year olds, used the ramp and managed some great scoring shots. H bowled quite well, but chucked a wobbly at getting “only 98” he wanted to get 100 or better, but it was not to be. He couldn’t even be placated by the fact that 98 is the highest score he’s ever bowled. D was disappointed with her score, but I reminded her that I had the lowest score for the day – what a coming back to earth after my Easter effort! J, the girls’ mum bowled well.

By the time the game was finished and we’d re-shod and returning our bowling shoes, it was time for lunch. It wasn’t the fine dining experience alluded to earlier, but McD’s. The kids had a “Happy Meal” each which included a collectable mini fluffy puppy – they thought it was great! We mums had a “deli choice” and a coffee. My opinion of McD’s has been reinforced. I’ve never had such slow fast food service in all my life. By the time we had our “meals” in hand, there were at least a dozen people queued up waiting to order. The kids worked off a bit of energy in the playground before we toddled off back to the car and ventured into the city centre.

After a pleasant although glary stroll along the boulevard known as North Terrace, we arrived at the Art Gallery of South Australia. As we had a stroller, we took the rear entrance and jumped on the lift, only to find ourselves in a restricted part of the gallery -- spooks at work? Finally back on track we wandered through the Contemporary, Australian and European sections. One interesting part of the exhibition was a case full of creatures constructed from clear white beads (wired I presume) and pieces of white Tupperware. There were indeed some interesting creatures; bats, frill-necked lizards, chicken legs, jelly fish, and of course a representation of “jug ears”.

J was his usual fidgety self, having to try and touch everything and chucking wobblies at the dro of a hat (that went on and on and on) when he couldn’t. It was hard for J to understand that it was all just look and NOT touch. This made it difficult to soak up the works of art as one needs more than 2 pairs of eyes.

After an hour or so, we re-emerged into the glary, but pleasantly warming afternoon sun, a far cry from the dreary damp day that had been predicted.

We mums decided that yes, we were glad we’d done it, but it would be quite a while before we attempted that sort of thing again, with youngsters in tow. H did thank us for taking him to the art gallery and said that he enjoyed it – he knows what side his bread is buttered on, doesn’t he!