Helping our kids and ourselves

On Wednesday I had the opportunity to sit, have a coffee and listen to an Educational and Clinical Psychologist (I’ll call him Tom) talk about helping children (and their parents) settle into school life.

I was rather slack and didn’t take notes – the thought never crossed my mind until it was too late. Thanks to the school’s weekly newsletter, I have a wrap up of the discussions.

Establishing routines with the children from Sunday night to Friday afternoon including:

* set bedtimes
* set reading times
* morning and afternoon job checklists, ie : “These are the things I need to do”
- packing their school bag
- eating their breakfast
- getting dressed by themselves
- brushing teeth, etc.

He stressed the need to introduce these jobs slowly so as not to overload them, He suggested one job every two weeks with lots of rewards and praise along the way.

Tom also spoke about the importance of being punctual when dropping off and picking up children from school as this is often a cause for concern for children.

Getting enough sleep:

Children need approximately ten hours sleep a night from Reception to Year 3. They should wake naturally. If you need to wake them, they are not receiving enough sleep. He stressed the important role of sleep in terms of concentration and learning.

Communication between parents, teachers and children:

Tom talked about the importance of role modeling from parents and other close adults (aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc) in terms of talking and active listening to encourage children to talk about their days and experiences. At night or on the way home from school, instead of asking “How was school today?” and “What did you do?”, and receiving the responses of “OK” or “Nothing”, try talking to your child about your day, including the good and he bad. Children may not want to talk at first, but will gradually become more confident and open given the right opportunities and time.

Tom also spoke about the importance of keeping the lines of communication with teachers and the school open – not just when things go wrong, but to acknowledge when things are going well too!

Friendships:

We need to model positive communication and interactions with others. He encouraged parents to become involved in the school community, to get to know other parents to help foster children’s friendships outside of school hours.


In the end, it all boils down to doing what works for you as a family, and for us all to have happy children going to school.

And in closing, the ages of children:

0-12 years - we are our children’s teachers
13-17 years - we are our children’s motivators
18 years onwards - if we get the first 2 right, we will be our children’s friends.